Deviation


I get it now. It took some reading and some digging but finally I found some people that could explain things clearly for me and I see my life in such a better way. Not that this makes my life any simpler. Basically it comes down to relaxing and clearing my mind. And this in itself isn’t as easy as it sounds either because although I can relax, clearing my mind is somewhat a tall order for me. I think harder in silence.

I’ve tried to meditate once and the initial outcome was interesting and then I fell asleep. Since meditation is a lot like sleep it adds another level of difficulty for me because all in all, I’m really good at sleep. So now I not only have to concentrate on clearing my thoughts AND staying awake … and then there’s a bunch of issues with practice and conviction which I cannot even get into right now. It sounds like I’ll be spending a long time perfecting this process, if that is even possible.

Now if only I can get past my procrastination …

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