One thing that I’ve found to want more than anythig else in my life is the chance to create. For as long as I can remember I have always had some need to design or create things, redevelop or suggest new ways of doing things, and tinking with mechanical and electronic gizmos. I’ve always got projects on my mind and even if I cannot afford to physically make the objects or processes myself, I draw or write them out and refine them whenever I get a chance.
I can’t help myself when the urge to do something comes along. I’ve been told by previous employers that I have a talent but I should focus on the job rather than come up with new things. It’s not something I can put down but it can be suppressed either through other activities or by using anti-depressants.
Right now I can hardly focus on anything as I’m thinking of several ideas I need to jot down or research. I’m playing with Google SketchUp 8 to construct some ideas in virtual space so I can maybe build them on Shapeways and if they work out maybe someone will want to buy them.
So I continue to put stuff up on DeviantArt and I continue to draw and research and one day it will all mean something but right now the urge is overpowering.